nOv. 24

i ws nt feeling well.. *sigh, my urination still bothers me alOt! i hv to went to toilet juz everytym i felt like peeing.. worst is lil urine cuming out.. and am v annoyed.. i felt discomfort..sumtyms its juz hurt my groin.. i din do anything exept lying on my bed, bt i juz keeps goin in and out of the toilet..haii.. so yah, i did a research to see whts goin on.. i knw i gt an illness bt yet i nv go to the doctor.. the reason is 1st. (i dun wan to burden my parents if sum serious case may cum out, esp. tht we are earning money for a new apartment.. this house will be demolished by may nxt yr) 2ndly (am also afaraid to knw of wht the doctor may say.. wht if?! yah,, of course i want to live a lil longer.. i hvnt achievd my dreams yet..bcuming a doctor perhaps to knw or to be able to cure myself..i dunno..) certain reasons i juz wanna live longer.. bcOz am having fun the time of my life now.. last tym whn i ws encountering the same problm in my town..i said this to myself, evn to my grandma,, "ill die at the age of 16" and nw tht im 16 am afraid tht those words wud cum to an end of me! wl! i cnt believe i said tht.. i ws 14 bck thn suffering the same case.. bt tht ws nth compared of today.. today is reali, simply, quite of a pain to me..

researchd and here were sum symptoms tht ive found out frm diff possible illnesses i hve..and the most symptoms tht i hd is in this illness: bladder cancer.. ahhh!!! frm the nme of the organ and the most fearsome illness connected.. T_T it triggered me most.. 1st symptom is.. blood in urine.. although sumtyms it dont happen.. i assumed tht it hppnd once or twice.. bcOz tht tym i found out tht my urine is abit orange in color.. means tht my urine=yellow mixed wif blood w/c is red.. 2nd symptom.. REDUCED URINE! and this is v true! this is wht am annoyed the most.. 3rd. pain during urination.. evrytym i urinate wht a *sigh.. 4th. FREQUENT URINATION! i alwys go in and out of the toilet! 5th. URINARY URGENCY! there's no tym tht i had a trivial urination.. 6th. abdominal pain.. occurs evrytym i finishd urinating.. WEIGHT LOSS!- true! frm the 1st sem of the yr weighd myself 40! and now am 36! wth! haiii.. all of these pinted out to my case.. whch mean i gt possiblity lah..bt i hope its not.. i reali, reali HOPE!! am only 16! oh god.. pls.. let me live longer.. i alwys pray evry night for blessings and the only wish i had is to hve gud health and long life.. so yah.. people shud tke care of urseves ah!! life is precious! i juz realized tht whn i am on my age nw.. ok enough of the crazy talk.. pls. pray for me.. and may the lord give me a chance..

i went to plaza sing wif my sis.. u knw,, to cherish life! haha.. rmbd wht sir said, so yah nv wasted my time on sleepin'.. sw senior clarenetist there bt she nv sw me bcoz i think she doesnt knw me..hehe.. if i rmb her nme ws rita? i juz dun recall.. srry if am wrong.. whoah quite tiring sia.. as we hv no money juz strolled around the place thn bought puzzle at daiso.. went to tiong mac and ate.. we were like racing for food.. we were tht hungry!haha!! went home thn played psp.. continued the brave story and i ws in chptr 4 i think..

nOv. 25

played psp frm morning till noon! haha!! stopped juz now.. bcoz lowbatt mah! how cn play?! hehe.. 2mr gt band prctice.. must wake up early! hei mun shud nt be late tmr deh! hahaha!! she evn say to call her whn am heading sch.. bt wht if i called her as early as i woke up!? hahaha!! to dsturb her and wake her up! hahaha!! if thts the case myb she'll nt be late agen.. bt thn i think she'll be early tmr.. aftrall its the last week.. hOpe it will be fun.. ^^